Filed under: Family, General, School | Tags: childhood depression, Gothic, Harvard Medical School, looking back
I’ve always been interested in childhood depression. Partly because I’m a kid who has fun researching things on wikipedia, and partly because I enjoy learning about these weird topics, but mostly because I think I was actually depressed as a child. My family probably won’t think so, but they don’t know me. Seriously. My family doesn’t know the real me and truly, they don’t care. If they had cared, they wouldn’t have picked on me as a kid, but I always seemed to be their target. Ho hum. Such is the life of me.
You see, it was mostly the people I hung out with *cough* Davy *cough* in the sixth grade. They always seemed to bring me down, and yet I still hung around with them. I wasn’t the skinniest kid in elementary school (I am still overweight) and I became a social outcast. As in my words in a “vent note” to myself (I found it in an old notebook from sixth grade.)
I hate myself. I really do. If it wasn’t for me, I wouldn’t be so weird. I am an outcast and I hate it. School sucks. People pick on me all the time. But school is nothing compared to the hell I call home. I REALLY hate my older brothers and sisters. It hurts knowing that my own family can’t even accept me for who I am.
I look back in awe at how much hate was put into that “vent note”. I’m being revived of my former depression now that I’m back in high school. Although I have good friends and not a lot of people pick on me, no one seems to like me. I am annoying. I tried so hard to change from what I used to be (although my brothers and sisters don’t care whether or not I try not to talk, they still see my own person as annoying) but I guess I haven’t changed. It seems that my “friends” from theatre camp that go to my school don’t want me to hang out with them. So I guess I won’t. I’ll leave everyone alone and we’ll all get what we want (except me, of course). I’ll go back into my “no friends, social outcast” theme, where everyone asks if I’m Gothic. And then everyone will believe that I’m gay again, because no girl seems to want to go out with me. I guess that you can’t be a smart, non-good looking guy and have a girlfriend. It doesn’t help that I’m accepting the fact that I can’t sing anymore (although Brandie believes I can’t sing at all. So much for family) considering that I can’t even hit the right pitches anymore.
So thats it then, I’ll grow old being a premature birth specialist, (thanks to my awesome niece who inspired me) and I’ll be lonely since even if I do graduate from Harvard Medical School, my family won’t care enough to even come or congratulate me.
Again, no trivia. I’m not in the mood.
Cody
Filed under: School | Tags: faggot, friends and enemies, high school is hell, Lisa, rumors, Sam, Tiffany
My day was an alright, all things considered. I’ll tell you about it:
Wake up-On the Bus
I woke up on time (thankfully) and got ready to leave after I ate breakfast. It was EXTREMELY cold out, (probably around 45°) so I almost froze on the way to school. I still felt a little hyper after that ice cream the night before, so I was in an alright mood.
First Period
After finding out that I had an unexcused absence in that class, (I over-slept on Friday) my mood started dropping. I did get to skip the test because of the absence, so I’ll get to retake that on Wednesday (the day before midterms). We did a midterm review and that was basically it. I had some make-up work but I’m done with it now.
Homeroom & The Office
I basically skipped homeroom, after checking in with my teacher, to go to see my counselor. I informed her of my college class situation, and that was that. But on the way to second period, I happened to run into Cody, (not myself, another Cody) who made smart remarks about taking Lisa away from me. I’ve moved on, glad that shes getting what she deserves, and went to second period with an alright mood.
Second Period
It was too cold to run today, so I basically hung out with Tiffany. She’s really cool and I’m actually starting to like her. (What’s up with me and liking girls that have boyfriends?) But of course, were “just friends” and it’ll probably stay that way.
Third Period & Lunch
Chorus was boring because all we did was get and sing our Christmas music (mostly hymns *shudder*) but I also might be attempting to write some country songs for a girl in chorus who is in a country band. Lunch was uninteresting, although I had to borrow money from Shelby again, considering we forgot to ask Dad for ours.
Fourth Period
Basically fourth period. I told Sam about my liking of Tiffany, and she soon turned it into a blackmail. Something like: “Let me borrow your outline for today or I’ll tell Tiffany”. So I replied: “Go ahead, I’ll never get her anyways and you’ll still fail History.” Side Note: [Yes mom, I know with friends like her, who needs enemies.]
Cody and his friends were yelling the usual on the way to the bus lot. You know stuff like:
“Cody [Insert my last name here] is a Bitch!”
and the one that never goes out of style:
“He’s also a fag. Not really, he’s gay.”
Kinda reminds me of elementary school, except high school is hell.
No Trivia Today.
Cody
Filed under: School, Trivia | Tags: Albert Einstein, chorus, environmental science, Gym, School, world history
I got all my progress reports back today and I have to say, ninth grade is EASY. So without further ado, I’ll proceed in shoving my grades in all of your doubter’s faces’:
Honor’s Earth & Environmental Sciences: 76% (this was before I finished all my make-up work so it’ll be a TON higher.)
Health/PE: 92% (I missed two days of dressing out.)
Chorus: 96% (And I’m making up a test on Monday so she can re-print my report.)
World History: 100% (What now!)
So there all you people who doubted that I am a teenage genius.
Now on to the fun stuff:
Quick Trivia:
Albert Einstein actually dropped out of high school (because his high school was based on the memorization of subjects, and not learning) but still became one of the world’s most famous scientist.
